Friday 5 October 2007

modesty - part one

at last ive started reading wendy shalit's book "a return to modesty". this has been all over the feminist blogosphere lately, and ive been meaning to read it to see what she has to say for herself, rather than purely read criticism of her.
hhm. well, im not very far in to it, but so far i am unimpressed. yes,i think she clearly addresses some of the problems that increased sexual freedom has caused - ie losing the right to say no, feeling like you HAVE to have sex, all this is pertinent and representative of issues and dilemmas women face. however, it is her reasons and solutions that i am having problems digesting. her methods and her stats are also subject to question. for instance, as interesting as the ancedote that her mum banned her from sex ed is, using to try and prove that not going to sex ed means she doesn't feel the need to "hook up" with men isn't a very strong approach or offer much support to her theory. it is a personal example, and therefore cannot really be used or substantiated in a sociological study.
i can't help but feel that the idea of returning to modesty is suggesting a tendancy to put the blame for problems with an over sexed society on to women. ie, we gave up modesty and now, surprise surprise, we are being coerced in to sex. (her lines, not mine) it doesn't seem far enough away from she wore a short skirt, so she was asking for it.
maybe i like wearing mini dresses, and maybe i like wearing baggy jeans and a hoody. maybe somedays i like being quiet and unassuming, and other days im loud and bolshy. it doesn't make any difference to me demanding respect from people around me.
im not sure if she's missing my point or im missing hers.

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